Sports, Motivation & Psychology

"Dare-to-Do Women want to optimise goals"

The movers and shakers of this world fascinate us all. As a successful journalist, Frank Wilmes has met many of them: founders, entrepreneurs, managers, soccer presidents, German chancellors and foreign heads of state like Nelson Mandela or Eduard Shevardnadze. In an interview with Style PASS online, he gives insights into his book "Do what you want: and see what Dare-to-Do People says about it".

Style PASS online: What is a "Dare-to-Do type"?

That's a person who does something that others don't dare to do. This is a person who wants to feel what life means. Life life for him and does mean to do what he wants to do.

Style PASS online: Within your profession as a journalist, you have met many "successful" people. How important is success from your point of view to be happy? And: What does success mean to you personally?

Well, in job, success counts, of course. Because the opposite of it is failure, and that is truly a displeasure. When we think of success, we almost always think of money and status. But success only makes you happy if it serves a real purpose. And that is not a question of hierarchy. If, for example, the cleaning lady in a hospital says she only has to clean floors and toilets, the work is a pure displeasure for her. But if she says she helps out, to make patients feel comfortable when everything is nice and clean, she feels happy about her work.

Success is important to me personally because I don't want to be an indifferent person. Children like to say, "I don't care." When adults think like that, they no longer feel the urge to make a meaningful change in their lives or for other people in a meaningful way.

Style PASS online: Is there a person who has fascinated you the most and why?

Not a superlative, there are a lot of people I am fascinated by, but I am fascinated by Coco Chanel, the founder of the Chanel fashion empire. She said this sentence: "To think independently and to express these thoughts is the bravest thing there is."

Her origins were obscure for a long time, because she was ashamed to hide that she had grown up in very poor circumstances as the illegitimate daughter of a pedlar and a laundress. She met rich men who paved the way for her to become independent. She became a legend in her own lifetime and is still today

In fact, she revolutionised the fashion of her century. She abolished the corset, invented the "little black dress".

Style PASS online: People sometimes say that in the USA mentality of people to take charge of their own lives is more more pronounced than in Germany, for example. What percentage of mentality do you need, how much percent character to become a "Dare-to-Do type"?

Good question, difficult answer. When they say she has a strong, it means that she can't be easily pushed away. And that is the decisive requirement for trust-you types. Mentality is what she shaped her as a child and is still working in her. That can be seen positively or negatively. In the USA, people have to take their lives into their own hands more than in Germany because they have less protection from the state.

This is precisely what gives rise to a mentality that is ideal for people who want to create something new on their own.

Style PASS online: In your opinion, what are the most reasons that people do not realise their dreams, fail to achieve their goals?

Firstly: If you don't get rid of envious people and know-it-all types, can’t make a change.

Secondly, if you don't learn from your mistakes, you can't do better. We can mature with failure and sharpen our life. My marriage failed after many years. I always thought it only happened to others.  

Thirdly: If you don't have courage, you can't dare. A simple statement, I know. But let's take a closer look. Courageless people insist on something in order not to have to  change. This gives them security, order and rhythm, a life like an assembly line, precise, without surprises. The desired behaviour automatically regulates a self-commitment and self-control. It is the way it is, and that is why it is so.

The „Dare-to-Do type“ on the other hand, breaks out of this normality, out of a pattern with clear assignments of habits, rules or traditions.

Style PASS online: Willingness to take risks are more pronounced in the male sex qua biology and upbringing than in women. Or has emancipation eliminated the differences?

Successful women want to optimise their goals, not maximise them. I think that's the crucial point between them and men. So this has nothing to do with emancipation.

 

One for all

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